Nap Trapped? Here Are 8 Life-Changing Tips To Enjoy Contact Naps
Nap trapped with your baby all day? Contact naps can become really drowning for every sleep-deprived parent. It's like a prison with the cutest inmate ever. In this blog post, I will show you eight tips that will help you manage contact naps and get the most enjoyable time out of them!
Both my children were contact napping junkies. During the first few weeks, there was no way I could put those babies down. They would immediately wake up and look at me like, "how dare you?"
With my first one, I tried a lot of methods.
Drowsy but awake.
Totally awake.
Fully sleeping.
Lying down with her while she was sleeping and rolling over the bed like a ninja.
I don't think there was not one thing I didn't try. I was that desperate. Why?
Because contact naps can be really drowning. You may be lying down or sitting with your baby on your chest or in your arms, but contact naps are surprisingly extremely EXHAUSTING. Not for the body, of course, but for the mind.
I always like to say that at that time, I perceived contact naps as jail time with the cutest inmate ever. Wherever I turned, there was her adorable face asking me to be held.
But here is what happened with my second baby. I stopped trying. I knew some things I didn't know with my first back then. Contact naps became a joy, at least most of the time.
Maybe you are rolling your eyes right now at me through the screen because I know how you feel. You just want to put that baby down. You just wish to have some space for one time.
And I want to help you with that. I really do.
What if I told you that there are ways you can make contact naps more enjoyable? What if I told you that you can make contact naps practical? Sounds good, huh?
But here is the thing. It will require some work and effort from you. So are you in? I hope so! Then let's begin with my 8 life-changing tips to manage contact naps and make the most of your shared nap time.
This article covers:
FAQ Contact Naps
Before we start, let's wrap up the most asked questions about contact naps.
1. What are contact Naps?
Contact naps are when you nap with your baby in contact with your body, often on your chest or in your arms.
2. At What age do contact naps mainly occur?
Contact naps are most common with newborns. In some cases, it can continue up until the age of one or even two years old.
3. Are contact naps bad?
No, there is absolutely not one thing bad about contact naps. They are a great way to foster bonding and provide comfort for your baby. However, parents can feel trapped when constantly contact napping. So while there is nothing negative about contact naps, parents can feel overwhelmed and just be over it.
4. Why are contact naps good?
Contact naps provide a great way for parents to bond and connect with their baby during nap time. Additionally, they can help babies relax and sleep better, aid in digestion, provide stimulation for growing brains, as well as provide comfort and security.
5. Why do babies sleep better when contact napping?
Babies may sleep better when contact napping because they feel safer and more secure when in close proximity to their parent or caregiver. The warmth of the parent's body also helps them relax. Often a short nap or cat nap is the result of a baby being put down.
6. When do contact naps stop?
Contact naps usually get less starting from 3-6 months, sometimes one year. Daytime sleep decreases as your baby gets older, and so will the contact naps.
1. Work On Your Mindset
Changing your mindset is the first step to make contact naps more enjoyable. You and only you are in control of your thoughts.
If your little one is a few weeks old, what are a few weeks compared to the amount of time you have already lived? In this moment, the days can feel very long, but in the end, it is only a few weeks to months. That is the reality.
I am fine with being a sleep prop to my baby.
We sometimes are so deep in a struggle that we shut out reality. We cannot let negativity take over. Repeat affirmations out loud:
"This is not going to last forever."
"This is natural behavior. My baby is not doing this on purpose,"
"A few weeks are nothing. I can do this."
It is more crucial than ever not to start obsessing about your baby's napping behavior. You need to stay focused that this will also pass.
It's time to stop viewing nap trapped as an obstacle in the way of freedom and start seeing it as a special bonding time between you and your baby. And you may not feel like this right now. Maybe all you feel is to be annoyed. But I promise you, the minute you start to control your mind, things will change!
2. Create The Perfect Nap Trap Environment
When you're nap trapped, you are restricted with limited movements, mainly arms. That's why it is super important to prepare the right nap trap environment in advance!
Here is a list of all the things I would have in reach. I would store them in little boxes next to my bed or on the living room table. When my baby would nap, I would put the boxes next to me, so I had everything I needed in reach.
1. Food & Drinks
You will live on snacks like a toddler. Fill your box with snacks and beverages. Nuts, fruit bars, fruits, whatever you like (I am not mentioning chocolate because I like to pretend I don't eat chocolate). Water bottle, coffee in a thermos jug. Have everything you can think of in that box.
2. TV Remote, Bluetooth Headphones, Charger
You will probably scroll the s*** out of your smartphone once that baby sleeps on you. Always keep a charger within reach and have your wireless headphones with you. Have your TV remote close so you can take in all the junk tv.
3. Blanket, Pillow
Doesn't matter how hot your chest gets, that feet will always freeze. Have a blanket in reach, so no one is getting cold. Have a pillow or two for yourself, but always make sure to have a safe sleep environment for your baby.
3. Get A Carrier
"I cannot get anything done" is probably the most used sentence when you have a baby that only wants to nap in your arms.
And you are damn right. You cannot get anything done.
But that's why a carrier is perfect! I have seen so many parents that were reluctant to get a carrier in the beginning and then started to love it. A carrier is a wonderful tool to get all the essential things done while your baby sleeps close to you. Prepare something to eat, clean up a little bit. The possibilities seem endless once you have two free and functioning arms.
Sometimes parents have the impression that their baby doesn't like the carrier. But that doesn't have to be necessarily true. It is normal that a baby first fusses when you put them in the carrier, but most of the time, they do great afterward. It's ok for your baby to fuss for a few minutes. They need time to get comfy. Often parents put their baby in the carrier when they are already very tired, so it is only normal that they are fussy.
4. Get Comfy
By getting comfy, I mean that you can now sit and scroll your phone and watch movies and Netflix without having one regret. Did you ever have a marathon of watching a new series? You now have the perfect opportunity to do that again. Read that again.
You can binge-watch without any bad feelings. You can watch Youtube videos for hours. You can do whatever you want, read a book, listen to one. Just get comfortable.
5. Take Advantage Of Naps
You can also take advantage of contact naps in different ways. Use it as a time to rest yourself. You can co-sleep with your baby but make sure it is all safe.
To feel good about ourselves, we need the feeling of having achieved something or being productive. You can also take care of some other tasks while your baby is sleeping. Create your to-do list, make appointments where needed, get in touch with your friends, read a book, learn something. There are, surprisingly, many things you can do while your baby sleeps on you.
6. Ignore Other Peoples Advice
I love when people tell you to just put the baby down.
WE WOULD PUT THAT BABY DOWN IF THEY LET US, RIGHT?
Sorry for yelling, but honestly, isn't this like THE FIRST THING we tried?
Ok, I am probably also repeating some advice that you have already heard, but this is a little bit different. The truth is you cannot control your baby or how they behave. All the tips above are things that YOU can do. But if a baby resists being put down, there is only little you can do. You may be able to give a bit of direction, but you can never fully control them.
I love when people tell me to just put my baby down. Like I haven't tried that for 1 million times!
That said, it can be very frustrating if people give you the same advice over and over again. Because it can make you feel like you have not tried enough. Deep down, you know what works for your baby and what doesn't. You can trust your motherly instinct.
So the most helpful way to deal with this is to ignore this advice. You don't need to justify in the "I tried, and it didn't work"-way. You don't need to explain that your baby wakes and doesn't sleep unless they are close to you. You are allowed to complain about your only contact napping baby without getting any advice. So save your energy, don't say anything, and ignore. Believe me, it will give you some peace of mind.
7. Stop Thinking About Independent Sleep
Don't let any sleep consultant hear about your struggles with contact naps. They are lingering in the bushes trying to throw their ultimate sleep solution at you: independent sleep and sleep training.
Independent sleep is not a complete myth, but baby sleep doesn't work like that. There is always a time and place to start with independent sleep skills.
And let's be honest, expecting independent sleep from a newborn is quite unrealistic. Contact napping especially happens in those first few weeks and months. It's biological behavior.
But if parents are bombarded with independent sleep, a sleep schedule, and self-settling, it can lead to a lot of anxiety and worsen the situation.
8. Start Healthy Sleep Habits Slowly
I also don't want you to feel completely helpless when it comes to contact naps. There are gentle ways you can promote more independent naps. Not from one day to another. But I can give you some tips on getting your baby used to a new sleep space by practicing.
The key is finding a comfortable and safe sleep space for your baby to sleep in, such as their crib or bassinet. Then, your baby can practice sleeping there once a day. The morning nap is a very good point to start because babies usually settle very easily in the morning due to high sleep pressure.
There is no need to let your baby nap in the crib for every single nap. Instead, try completely without pressure or any expectations every day for one nap. Then, without you noticing, they are already getting used to it, every day a little bit more.
If you want to learn more about how you can gently improve your baby's sleep, check out my Baby Sleep Guide. It contains a variety of methods for every age to get your baby used to sleeping without your help.